20 hours ago with 199,088 notes
tupacabra:

you’ve been hit by
you’ve been struck by
a smooth criminal

tupacabra:

you’ve been hit by

you’ve been struck by

a smooth criminal

(Source: miloserdie)

20 hours ago with 36,280 notes

"After wrapping Guardians of the Galaxy I was very homesick and I was coming home to my wife and my son, who at the time was 13 months old. My wife told me ‘Hey, listen there’s a chance he may not recognize you and he may be a little shy’ and so I came in there, and he just sat right up and had this big smile on his face. He started saying ‘Daddy, daddy, daddy!’ and I just started to cry. He saw the tears in my eyes and started doing bits to make me laugh and that just made me cry more."

- Chris Pratt on the best day of his life.

(Source: squidward-tenassholes)

20 hours ago with 51,912 notes

(Source: joeveix)

20 hours ago with 644,089 notes

arrogantdad:

my mom told me that in high school she use to get boyfriends at the beginning of February so they had enough time to get her a valentines day gift and then break up with them the day after and just keep the gift and one day she told her parents about it and they made her keep her boyfriend at least until the end of February and so she did and that boy is now my dad

20 hours ago with 313,888 notes

bleachdalilah:

thtwhitegurrl:

slutdust:

I bought my friend an elephant for their room.

They said “Thank you.”

I said “Don’t mention it.”

Is there a joke here that 15 thousand people get but I don’t?

PLEASE EXPLAIN

20 hours ago with 96,207 notes
a discussion on sexual orientation
  • me: *explaining various sexual orientations to a classmate*
  • classmate: wait, what's polyamory?
  • me: well, it's when someone has more than one intimate relationship at a time with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved.
  • professor: *overhears from front of class*
  • professor: that is d i s g u s t i n g
  • me: *defensively* um, actually, no it's--
  • professor: how DARE they put a greek prefix on a latin root like that?! What right do they have to decimate my beautiful antiquated languages?!?! GREEK AND LATIN DO NOT FRATERNIZE THIS IS LIKE THAT STUPID ROMANTIC SUBPLOT BETWEEN THAT DWARF AND THAT ELF IN THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG NO NO NO NO NO NO!!!
  • me: ....
  • me: ....
  • me: ....
  • professor: it should be polyerosy
20 hours ago with 282,066 notes

eggsus:

officialpollen:

celebrities that get more shit than they should:

  • nicki minaj
  • ke$ha
  • miley cyrus
  • lorde
  • lindsay lohan
  • taylor swift

celebrities that don’t get enough shit:

  • justin bieber
  • nash grier
  • justin bieber

notice how the first list is all women leading the industry. notice how the second list is two teenage boys who think they run shit but they’re hurting people.

20 hours ago with 182,402 notes
willow-wanderings:

nedahoyin:

queenqueerqutie:


Martin Bauendahl

Real life vs Societal expectations

Wow..


Yeah, news flash people, boobs generally only look “perky” while in a bra. A few are super lucky and have naturally perky boobs, most don’t. And this is because, SURPRISE, boobs are intended to feed babies and it’s hard for a baby being cradled in mum’s arm to reach a nipple that’s on the other side of the boob from where its mouth is.Think of a soda fountain machine. The spouts are all pointing down, right? So you can put soda in a cup being held under the spout? If the spout was sticking straight out, it would be really hard to get a soda out of it.Babies need to be able to reach a nipple easily so they can eat. Ergo, nipples are usually lower and angled more downward on a naturally hanging boob, both so it’s easier for a baby to reach and so gravity can do its part in pulling milk toward the nipple.So there you go, outright ANATOMICAL proof that boobs are not there for the benefit of men.

willow-wanderings:

nedahoyin:

queenqueerqutie:

Martin Bauendahl

Real life vs Societal expectations

Wow..

Yeah, news flash people, boobs generally only look “perky” while in a bra. A few are super lucky and have naturally perky boobs, most don’t. And this is because, SURPRISE, boobs are intended to feed babies and it’s hard for a baby being cradled in mum’s arm to reach a nipple that’s on the other side of the boob from where its mouth is.

Think of a soda fountain machine. The spouts are all pointing down, right? So you can put soda in a cup being held under the spout? If the spout was sticking straight out, it would be really hard to get a soda out of it.

Babies need to be able to reach a nipple easily so they can eat. Ergo, nipples are usually lower and angled more downward on a naturally hanging boob, both so it’s easier for a baby to reach and so gravity can do its part in pulling milk toward the nipple.
So there you go, outright ANATOMICAL proof that boobs are not there for the benefit of men.

(Source: denicedenice)

20 hours ago with 384,808 notes
comcasting:

My grandpa texted for the first time in his life today and he spit straight wisdom out of the keyboard

comcasting:

My grandpa texted for the first time in his life today and he spit straight wisdom out of the keyboard

(Source: fandamngo)

20 hours ago with 126,850 notes

wobbufetts:

aidn:

how the hell do i talk to people

Stand in front of them and press A

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